JimBlue wrote:
A corny joke. They were added to seed catalogs years ago.
Welcome to the AppalachianTrailCafe.net!
Take a moment and register and then join the conversation
Take a moment and register and then join the conversation
A place for jokes
This site uses cookies. By continuing to browse this site, you are agreeing to our Cookie Policy.
-
-
-
-
-
-
breeding with poodles would create Snickers doodles.
The post was edited 1 time, last by WanderingStovie ().
-
-
-
-
-
-
Grizzly Bears are far more dangerous than black bears. It's good to keep in mind that Grizzly's can't climb trees. How to tell the difference? If you see a bear, climb a tree. If it climbs up & eats you it's a black bear. If it knocks the tree over & eats you it's a grizzly bear.
-
-
I know a guy who punched a black bear in the nose after being charged. He seems to have beaten the odds.
-
meat wrote:
What kind of hot sauce do bears like? I'm going shopping tomorrow so I might as well get em sumthin they like.
The post was edited 1 time, last by ScareBear ().
-
-
-
-
-
NoAngel wrote:
MYTH:
The best defense against a bear is a gun.
TRUTH:
Research has shown that a mortally wounded bear usually lives long enough to seriously injure its
attacker. People using guns against bears are more often att
acked and more severely injured than those using pepper
spray to defend themselves and deter the bear. While so-ca
lled “bear spray” cannot prevent an encounter with a bear,
it is by far the best known method of preventing attack and
injury, if an encounter occurs. Pepper spray is also non-
toxic and will not permanently harm either the bear or the person exposed to it.
While research may have shown that more people with guns are attacked by bears, there is a simple reason. Hunting. It takes you right into Mr. Bear's kitchen. For anyone to believe that HIKERS with GUNS are attacked more often and more severely than HIKERS with BEAR SPRAY would require complete suspension of all belief in reality. I don't even know how to form my bitch letter to fws.gov about this misleading and dangerous statistic. In any encounter with any bear the human with the gun will fare better than the human with the bear spray. What, you think Mr. Bear hates pepper spray more than a 10mm round to the chest? Yeah. Right. Best known method of preventing an attack and preventing injury if an encounter occurs? Bear spray? Versus a 45-70 or 12gauge with a Brenneke slug? Excuse me while I LMAO. Those are two guns made to slaughter Mr. Grizz. Right where he stands. It may take me 6 or 7 10mm shots, but Mr. Bear aint gonna close that distance with his lungs shot out. Bear spray vs. a gun....let me see....why don't we just arm the police with bear spray and take their guns away? LMAO.
And note the terminology...."mortally wounded bear"....three words you never ever ever ever will hear with the use of bear spray....mortally wounded hiker....those are three words you may in fact hear with the use of bear spray...just sayin.... -
I have a family member who lives in Montana, he does not hike without two cans of bear (Griz) spray...one to fend off the bear (Grizzly) and the other for when he walks out and the bear (Grizzly) comes back for another attempt, which he told me is quite common.
-
ScareBear wrote:
NoAngel wrote:
MYTH:
The best defense against a bear is a gun.
TRUTH:
Research has shown that a mortally wounded bear usually lives long enough to seriously injure its
attacker. People using guns against bears are more often att
acked and more severely injured than those using pepper
spray to defend themselves and deter the bear. While so-ca
lled “bear spray” cannot prevent an encounter with a bear,
it is by far the best known method of preventing attack and
injury, if an encounter occurs. Pepper spray is also non-
toxic and will not permanently harm either the bear or the person exposed to it.
While research may have shown that more people with guns are attacked by bears, there is a simple reason. Hunting. It takes you right into Mr. Bear's kitchen. For anyone to believe that HIKERS with GUNS are attacked more often and more severely than HIKERS with BEAR SPRAY would require complete suspension of all belief in reality. I don't even know how to form my bitch letter to fws.gov about this misleading and dangerous statistic. In any encounter with any bear the human with the gun will fare better than the human with the bear spray. What, you think Mr. Bear hates pepper spray more than a 10mm round to the chest? Yeah. Right. Best known method of preventing an attack and preventing injury if an encounter occurs? Bear spray? Versus a 45-70 or 12gauge with a Brenneke slug? Excuse me while I LMAO. Those are two guns made to slaughter Mr. Grizz. Right where he stands. It may take me 6 or 7 10mm shots, but Mr. Bear aint gonna close that distance with his lungs shot out. Bear spray vs. a gun....let me see....why don't we just arm the police with bear spray and take their guns away? LMAO.
And note the terminology...."mortally wounded bear"....three words you never ever ever ever will hear with the use of bear spray....mortally wounded hiker....those are three words you may in fact hear with the use of bear spray...just sayin....
Be wise enough to walk away from the nonsense around you! -
Be wise enough to walk away from the nonsense around you!
-
meat wrote:
I have a family member who lives in Montana, he does not hike without two cans of bear (Griz) spray...one to fend off the bear (Grizzly) and the other for when he walks out and the bear (Grizzly) comes back for another attempt, which he told me is quite common.
-
ScareBear wrote:
meat wrote:
I have a family member who lives in Montana, he does not hike without two cans of bear (Griz) spray...one to fend off the bear (Grizzly) and the other for when he walks out and the bear (Grizzly) comes back for another attempt, which he told me is quite common.
Lest we forget.....
SSgt Ray Rangel - USAF
SrA Elizabeth Loncki - USAF
PFC Adam Harris - USA
MSgt Eden Pearl - USMC -
I could believe that there is an alternative explanation to people with guns being more often the victim of bear attacks - they get foolishly confident and molest the bears or otherwise take risks that the unarmed wouldn't. I'm not saying anyone here would do that, but it's hard to underestimate the stupidity of some people. That's the only explanation I can think of for the fact that the commonest location for snakebite is the hand.
I don't hike in grizzly country, and the statistics show that black bear attacks on humans are vanishingly rare. (In general, any risk you hear about from horror stories on the evening news is a risk you don't need to worry about - because the real risks aren't newsworthy.) I've never been fortunate enough to see more of a bear than its arse - running away from me as fast as it can. The only precaution that I take against bears is never to leave food unsecured.
Confession: I do sleep with my food from time to time. Generally, I prefer to hang it. If I sleep with it, that means that I need to take it with me when I leave my tent in the night. I don't want to have to do that. There may be a bear can in my future, since I foresee occasionally hiking in places where the law says you have to have one.
I think that in black bear country, even bear spray is needless weight. And I certainly don't think I'd ever hit the backcountry carrying anything heavier than a .380 - surely not a 10mm, or a .45-70, or a 12-gauge. (And it's none of your business what's in my pack, or whether or not it includes a firearm.)I'm not lost. I know where I am. I'm right here. -
Dan76 wrote:
ScareBear wrote:
meat wrote:
I have a family member who lives in Montana, he does not hike without two cans of bear (Griz) spray...one to fend off the bear (Grizzly) and the other for when he walks out and the bear (Grizzly) comes back for another attempt, which he told me is quite common.
I figure if I can drop a 180 pound white tail with a .41 magnum(same power/size as 10mm) with one shot at 50 yards, Mr. Bear is in a bit of trouble...YMMV...
And although I understand folks, especially Kevin, believe the two legged predators are the bigger danger.... a .380 or smaller is better than nothing. But it's not optimal. 9mm is the minimum for me. No .380, no .38spl that isn't +P with over 280lbs of energy, no .22 joke. Yeah, I said it. Even the .22 magnum is a bad odd for a manstopper. Better aim for the eye...seriously. Unless it is point blank and behind the ear(ala Mossad) the .22 is more annoying than deadly in a gunfight...to a bear it is like a wasp sting... -
-
JimBlue wrote:
I've never heard of a .22 for anything other than paper targets or small animals.
I'm not lost. I know where I am. I'm right here. -
I know about .22 long rifle. It is possible to kill or harm a person with it. But I wouldn't want to rely on it in a life or death situation.
Yes. I know about the .223 m-16. I prefer the M-1 Garand. But I don't have any of those weapons.--
"What do you mean its sunrise already ?!", me. -
Dan76 wrote:
ScareBear wrote:
meat wrote:
I have a family member who lives in Montana, he does not hike without two cans of bear (Griz) spray...one to fend off the bear (Grizzly) and the other for when he walks out and the bear (Grizzly) comes back for another attempt, which he told me is quite common.
Edited to add....but I'm just too damn lazy to carry a gun so...hope I'm tasty.I may grow old but I'll never grow up. -
-
A 60-year-old Retired Marine who goes to the doctor for a check up. The doctor tells him, “You’re in terrific shape. There’s nothing wrong with you. Why, you might live forever, you have the body of a 35-year-old. By the way, how old was your father when he died?”
The old Marine responds: “Did I say he was dead?”
The doctor is surprised and asks: “How old is he and is he very active?”
The old Marine responds: “Well, he's also a retired Marine, that is 82 years old and he still hunts all season, cuts his own wood and runs a little 40 acre tobacco farm just to keep in shape.”
The doctor can't believe it. So he asks: “Well, how old was your grandfather when he died?”
The old Marine responds:“Did I say he was dead?”
The doctor is astounded and says: “Come on! You mean to tell me you are 60 years old and both your father and your grandfather are both alive? Is your grandfather very active?”
The old Marine responds: “Well, he's also a retired Marine, that is 106 years old and but he still has a trout line he runs every morning. He’s a dead shot with a rifle and fills his deer tag every year. He runs a few coon dogs for sport and he can still carry his liquor with the best of them. Not only that, next week my 106-year-old grandfather is getting married again!"
At this point the doctor has heard just about enough and says: “At 106 years, why on earth does your grandfather want to get married?”
The old Marine responds: “Did I say he wants to?”Do your duty in all things. You cannot do more, you should never wish to do less. - Robert E. Lee -
-
NoAngel wrote:
I learned a new word at work this week: fuktard- someone incapable of doing anything right.
Do your duty in all things. You cannot do more, you should never wish to do less. - Robert E. Lee -
NoAngel wrote:
I learned a new word at work this week: fuktard- someone incapable of doing anything right.
-
Oh man, I had this same experience. I was in the lot at Harriman getting ready for work. Had my official looking shirt, my helmet was on the roof of my car. A young couple is walking around the lot, the young mans face in his gadget, a worried look on her face. She looks over at me a few times. I hear him say, "well lets take this trail, see if we get service." She looks up at me .........."SIR!"
I convince them there will be NO service around here. I tell them the book store is 10 minutes from here and they can get a map, and they can park in the Big lot.
I saw no search helos that day or packs of bloodhounds, so I guess they made it.............or went to the Zoo.Cheesecake> Ramen -
-
CoachLou wrote:
Oh man, I had this same experience. I was in the lot at Harriman getting ready for work. Had my official looking shirt, my helmet was on the roof of my car. A young couple is walking around the lot, the young mans face in his gadget, a worried look on her face. She looks over at me a few times. I hear him say, "well lets take this trail, see if we get service." She looks up at me .........."SIR!"
I convince them there will be NO service around here. I tell them the book store is 10 minutes from here and they can get a map, and they can park in the Big lot.
I saw no search helos that day or packs of bloodhounds, so I guess they made it.............or went to the Zoo.
Be wise enough to walk away from the nonsense around you! -
I guess we can all relate to some folks weekends..... [IMG:http://i3.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/001/260/266/048.jpg]Be wise enough to walk away from the nonsense around you!
-
Share
- Facebook 0
- Twitter 0
- Google Plus 0
- Reddit 0
-
Similar Threads