Perks of reaching 50 or being over 60 and heading towards
70! How about past 80 or 90?
1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.
2. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released
first.
3. No one expects you to run--anywhere.
4. People call at 9 PM and ask, "Did I wake you?"
5. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
6. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.
7. Things you buy now won't wear out.
8. You can eat supper at 5 PM .
9. You can live without sex, but not your glasses.
10. You get into heated arguments about pension plans.
11. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
12. You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who
walks into the room.
13. You sing along with elevator music.
14. Your eyes won't get much worse.
15. Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning
to pay off.
16. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the
national weather service.
17. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they
can't remember them either.
18. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable
size.
19. You can't remember who sent you this list.
20. And you notice these are all in Big Print for your
convenience.
21. You are totally invisible to the younger crowd.
22. You have no idea what you were talking about a few minutes ago.
23. She is your bartender for the last three years and you can't remember the blonds name.
24. You hang out with other men and commiserate how quiet it is in a noisy restaurant.
25. You can fix a electrical outlet and she won't trust you to change a not so bright bulb.
26. Going to college was easier than going to funeral.
27. She is easier to admire now that you cant find your glasses.
28. Going to the woods for a 5 hour hike is better than an hour in a shopping mall.
29. She has no idea what REI or EMS or Campmor is until she sees the Credit Card statement.
30. And clearly number 1 - Her Idea of a good time is when you go on a long backpacking trip.
70! How about past 80 or 90?
1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.
2. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released
first.
3. No one expects you to run--anywhere.
4. People call at 9 PM and ask, "Did I wake you?"
5. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
6. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.
7. Things you buy now won't wear out.
8. You can eat supper at 5 PM .
9. You can live without sex, but not your glasses.
10. You get into heated arguments about pension plans.
11. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
12. You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who
walks into the room.
13. You sing along with elevator music.
14. Your eyes won't get much worse.
15. Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning
to pay off.
16. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the
national weather service.
17. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they
can't remember them either.
18. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable
size.
19. You can't remember who sent you this list.
20. And you notice these are all in Big Print for your
convenience.
21. You are totally invisible to the younger crowd.
22. You have no idea what you were talking about a few minutes ago.
23. She is your bartender for the last three years and you can't remember the blonds name.
24. You hang out with other men and commiserate how quiet it is in a noisy restaurant.
25. You can fix a electrical outlet and she won't trust you to change a not so bright bulb.
26. Going to college was easier than going to funeral.
27. She is easier to admire now that you cant find your glasses.
28. Going to the woods for a 5 hour hike is better than an hour in a shopping mall.
29. She has no idea what REI or EMS or Campmor is until she sees the Credit Card statement.
30. And clearly number 1 - Her Idea of a good time is when you go on a long backpacking trip.
Be wise enough to walk away from the nonsense around you! 
